The story begins like any other, fillip is asleep on the couch, clothes on the floor, the room is a mess, some empty bottles and the room smells like whiskey. Any other person would be out of his mind to stay in such a place, but fillip is looking out for the future.
Suddenly, There’s a knock on the door! Fillip jumps up and clears some of the trash so he can get through the room. He looks through the door and sees no one on the other side. He grumbles some curse words silently as he turns around to go back to bed, but then he hears another, this time much louder, knock. It felt like the sound went right through his ears and into his head, which felt like it was about to explode.
He opens the door, to find her. Sally, she had long red hair, the most beautiful eyes you’ve ever seen, and legs that seems to go on forever. The most perfect body imaginable. She looked at our hero with disgust, he clearly hadn’t shaven for a week, his hair was a mess, and she could see into his apartment. “I’ve been sent to kill you” she said. He replied by exclaiming “fuck! Well, atleast it’s by a hot chick” he had a crooked grin across his face and he had clearly not gotten all of the whiskey out of his system.
She had a look of disgust on her face as she said “I was sent here to kill you, but I have no intention of following those orders, although I’m almost starting to rethink that” fillip turned pale as he was starting to realize that this is all really happening and apologized and asked why his life was spared, she replied “I work for a secret organization called ‘the velvet assassins’ and we’ve taken down dictators and conspirers, now I was ordered to kill some guy living in his own filth and never leaves his apartment. Frankly, you’re alive due to my curiosity. ” fillip didn’t really know how to respond to this he just stood there with a confused look on his face as she continues: “I was intending on sitting down with you in your apartment but it looks a bit crowded, how about we go to the nearby bar”.
As they left the apartment building fillip realized it’s day, the sun seemed brighter than ever they go down the street to the bar and start talking, fillip explains how he has no clue why he’d be an assassination target but as she starts taking a shot every time he does and it somehow turns into a drinking contest and he eventually told her about a science project they did in college, where they made a wheel that wouldn’t stop spinning unless you stopped it even if you didn’t apply energy. She started laughing saying “yeah right!” she was clearly quite entoxicated. The rest of the evening is a blur.
She woke up the next morning with a banging headache, she looked around to see trash and whiskey bottles, she looked down, and saw fillip had fallen out of the couch next to her, she sat up terrified and grabbed her clothes and ran out the door. But she couldn’t help but think about what she did remember from last night, she had a good time with fillip, both at the bar an at his apartment.
Several weeks passed, and fillip began to question whether those strange recollections really happened or if he’s simply starting to lose his mind and suddenly there’s a knock on the door, he feels his heart skip a beat, who could it be? He walks over to the door and opens it, he sees a big burly man, wearing a wife beater and shorts, he looks about 6 feet tall, bald and wearing sun glasses. He proclaims “I’ve been sent to kill you” as to which fillip responded “not this again” in a cold tone. He lifts his gun to fillip’s head and turns the safety off. Suddenly there’s a thud and he falls over fillip when fillip pushes him aside he sees how there’s a short crossbow bolt stuck in his neck. He looks outside to find who did this, but sees no one, when he turns around sally is standing right there, and she kisses him.
She soon pulls away as he hasn’t been brushing his teeth for a while. She apologizes and admits she hasn’t been completely honest with him, she’s actually CIA agent infiltrating the velvet assassins and the reason she didn’t kill him that day was that she has a problem with killing civilians. However, it seemed that her client had moved on to other assassins.
“so, you know who wants me killed?” fillip eagerly asked. “it’s not that simple” she said, “I’ve only been given a location to report to, not a name, no form of identity.” She had barely finished the sentence until fillip dragged her out the door, they were going there now.
When they got outside fillip started opening his old rusty Volvo, but she had other plans, she pressed a button and the most expensive motorcycle imaginable came rolling down the street, it was like nothing he had ever seen. She jumped on it and dragged him up behind her. Even though she’d never admit it, it felt settling to have his arms around her.
When they reached the warehouse they saw a man wearing a black cape and a top hat. As they approached he said “so, you’re still alive, and you brought the assassin, I never should have trusted a woman with a man’s job” and fillip recognized that voice, it was his old classmate and friend Malcolm! “Why would you do this?” He asked. “Why does anyone do anything? Money of course” Malcolm quickly replied, “we had the greatest invention ever and your poor marketing made it worthless, and as you own half of it I can’t sell it, this seemed like the easiest solution, in fact. It still does and it’s time for you to DIE!!!” he turned around, as sally pulled her hidden blade out and swung it at Malcolm. He grabbed her wrist and threw her to the ground, the blade slid over to fillip. As he was kicking her in the stomach, she coughed “please help me fillip”. Malcolm started laughing and said “you think he’d have the guts to do that? He was a pussy in high school and he’s a pussy now” fillip grabbed the knife, his hands were shaking.
when Malcolm kicked her yet again he just felt an unbelievable surge of rage and threw the knife and hit Malcolm in the throat. As fillip came closer Malcolm said, “I’m sorry fillip my family is starving since their mother passed away and I needed the money to feed them. Without me, now they will die.” As he said that fillip confirmed that his pulse had gone out, and Malcolm had forever left this world.
Epilogue
Four weeks after those horrible series of event Fillip and sally got married and bought a house at the coast, they adopted Malcolm’s two daughters and fillip never had to drink whiskey again.
THE END
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